Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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