peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
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