Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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