Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize
