We're facebook friends in real life
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Randomize
