when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
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