I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
The adults are the big ones right?
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