i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
My lunch today consisted of going on the brewery tour with my boss. Free pretzels and two free beers.
I hate you.
To be fair, the beers are only 8 ounces each. So maybe you just kinda dislike me.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
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