You're completely useless in the revolution.
ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
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