just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
A+ Viking dick
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
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