I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
Randomize
