I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
I just cut my nipple shaving
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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