i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
