i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
I have two black x marks on my hands.
Yep you got cut off last night after a stripper bent over in front of you and you screamed very loudly 'I can see your soul from here'
damnit I wish I could remember that.
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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