Pregnant stripper...not hot.
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
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