At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
Randomize
