come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
home. puking in laundry basket.
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
