no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Randomize