Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
