i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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