literally had 100 drinks last night.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
Randomize
