yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
Randomize
