Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
party gras won. party gras always wins.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize
