Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
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