it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
Randomize
