hotel room ftw
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
