Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize