the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
jump out the window naked night went bad
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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