Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
