Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
This baby is an asshole
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
50% drunk capacity currently
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Randomize
