Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
Redeem this text for a blowjob
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
