Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
