There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
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