You're my little dorito
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
Let's get the cat blown out
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
Randomize
