i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves.
Those were the highlights of my night.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
They have beer where we have blood.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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