Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
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