I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Randomize
