Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
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