then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
Holy shit, Uber is testing a service to summon an ice cream truck.
Bring me the penis of the founder so I may endlessly fellate him. Or cunnalinge. I don't discriminate.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
His nipple licking is glorious
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