I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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