Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Randomize
