I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Randomize
