your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
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