Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
