just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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