But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
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