They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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