Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
Randomize