I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
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