If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
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