ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Randomize
