question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
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